Yay! You’re engaged! ….So what’s next?

It’s a moment every little girl dreams of. The moment her prince charming gets down on one knee and opens a delicate little box to show her a beautiful diamond to ask for her hand in marriage and they hold hands and ride off into the sunset to live happily ever after. Or at least that’s what Disney movies taught me.


But in reality, that shit takes work. And by work, I mean dating your fair share of losers before you’ve found your prince charming. I know I have. I once agreed to go out with this persistent little weasel looking guy who was 100% not my type but he wouldn’t stop asking. In a moment of mental weakness, I thought much like George Costanza and told myself “well, if what I do is always wrong, then the exact opposite must be right!” So out I went in my favourite pair of dark denim Gap jeans and a fresh white t-shirt, make up and freshly washed hair to meet Mr.Weasel at a popular Mexican restaurant. We meet outside and get seated right next to the window and order our drinks. Within minutes, Sir Weasel face leans in and in a gentle voice (as if to lessen the burn of the impending insult) “You know, you would look great in some much more feminine clothes. I can take you shopping for some skirts and dresses tomorrow if you want.” I guess the look on my face said more than I ever could. I quickly snapped “You’re going to give me lessons on clothing? You’re wearing khakis like you’re about to sell me a used car.” Our evening was off to a less than enthusiastic start. The waitress comes to take our order and I said I had stomach issues and left. So much for the Costanza theory.

I finally found my guy and after a few years, he got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife. It was a perfectly beautiful, romantic moment just for the two of us to share. A truly memorable and incredible moment! But what nobody tells you about being engaged: it really IS just a moment. And once you let the news spread of your special moment and newly engaged status, that’s where all the questions begin.

So, when is the big day! How many carats is your ring? Where did he get it? Where will you honeymoon? Do you want my photographer’s number? Oh I have the perfect place for you to have your reception!

Let me just say this to start: CALM. THE. FUCK. DOWN! I got engaged 20 minutes ago, I do not have a date. Yes I know all about my ring and no, I don’t want your photographer’s number. It’s been 2 days since my man put a ring on it and it’s already nuts. Disney failed to mention this aspect.

I guess my point is this: In a society where we all want the next best thing right this minute, we tend to overlook the daily joys of life. Marriage is a choice. It’s a journey, not a destination. Shit. That was pure fucking poetry, Tara. No wonder he put a ring on it! But really, we tend to always be looking ahead to the next big thing coming. When you’re dating, when are you getting engaged? When you’re engaged, when are you getting married? When you’re married, when are you having a baby? When you have a baby, when are you having the next one? Why are we in such a rush to get to the next best thing and not stop and enjoy the moment? My moment is right now and now has been since Saturday. When will my “now” end? I don’t know. Whenever I fucking feel like it and whenever I decide to let people in on another amazing moment that is about the 2 of us taking a big step, together. Right now, I couldn’t be happier and I think that’s all that really matters.